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13.
Sex with someone I love.
- Woody Allen
Don't knock masturbation -- it's sex with someone I love.

Woody Allen in Annie Hall, 1977
作者 mandingoe 2005年11月07日
547 267
 
1.
The act of touching oneself to produce a favorable feeling in the groin area. Usually accompanied by some sort of mental, visual, or audio stimulation to assist in reaching climax.

jerking off; spit-shining the old water pump; waxing the brass candlestick; beating off; playing cards with only one hand on the table; riding the quarter-horse; joining the mile-high club, solo-aviator division; giving in to the hand police; self-actualization; fully realizing your potential
No honey, I don't want to tonight, I'm tired from watching Oprah. Why don't you just go masturbate?

That dumb broad got me all worked up and left me; so I had to spit-shine the old water pump manually if ya know what I mean.

Sometimes, when I wake up, I have an erection, so I have to beat off until it goes away. Sometimes, it comes back so I beat off again until it goes away. Once, it kept coming back so I just chopped it off. It hurt bad.
作者 jeffro 2003年2月25日
8867 2793
 
2.
Mass murder of millions of tiny defenseless sperm.
If hitler was into masturbation instead of murder all the millions of deaths would not upset the world.
作者 Michael............... 2006年3月23日
8101 2883
 
3.
The act of sexualy pleasing oneself, usually to orgasm.
Masturbation is the best exercise I get all day!
作者 Nick 2002年11月10日
4814 1980
 
4.
Manual stimulation of the penis of vagina to produce a stimulation simular to actual penetration by a member of the opposite sex.

It's something most of us have been caught doing, never admit to doing, and know full well that everyone else does.
Woody Allen: "Don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone that I love."
作者 fetusboy 2005年9月16日
3603 1804
 
5.
"Practise sex"
If masturbation were a sport, I'd be a jock.
作者 LORD HELL FEAR BLOOD 2003年3月16日
3471 1728
 
6.
something guys cannot get out of habbit.
Time for my daily jerk!
作者 I have have seen the promise land 2003年4月14日
3199 1583
 
7.
Playing solo on one's organs.
作者 anonymous 2003年3月09日
2822 1414